Obstacle Course

This morning at 5:30 a.m. I was greeted by an obstacle course. It didn't end after EB - I don't think it will ever end.


There were 8 EB Obstacle stations through which each member of the group rotated:

1. Jump Rope (my fave...in a lovely turn of fate we ran out of time and I didn't get to this one - little happy dance)

2. Lift large heavy bar over head while squatting

3. Squat with one foot resting (while leg shaking) on large box, then hop to the other side and squat the same way. While hopping, extend arms in air like grabbing a rebound. (Code for "Flail")

4. Push ups and such things while holding on to large circular rings dangling from the top of an SUV, mid-levitation

5. DI-GM wraps very large thick (5-6 inches or so) rubber band around waist and makes your run, sprint, run backwards, do defensive slides in one direction while he pulls you in the other. This was a highlight. I felt like an ox.

6. Stomach stuff (DIs called this "our break"). Staying in a hover while things burn = Not a break. Eating Ben & Jerry's while watching Big Love = Break.

7. Arm strengthening exercises with band

8. 8 cones with tennis balls on one end, 8 cones with tennis balls on the other end. Pick up tennis ball, run across, place on opposite facing cone until all cones on one end have tennis balls then do the same thing the other way. THIS PERSON WAS THE TIME KEEPER. So, if the person doing obstacle, let's call her "Tina", decides to collapse mid way then everyone at the other stations would have to keep going until she revived herself and continued on with the tennis balls until they were again located at their starting point. By luck of the draw, I did this one last. Ha. ha. ha.

Weirdly, I feel like this course sort of mirrored stuff that was going on. For example, the jump rope "obstacle" is my whole day. Jump around as quickly as I can without tripping up. Kids, work, J, pediatrician, dinner, kids, work, client, bath time, work, husband, work, kids. Jump. Jump. Jump. Trip - Forgot to put salt in rice. Trip - Drop kid. Oh sigh.

The 8 cone extravaganza was also analogous to "a day in the life". Run back and forth until I either collapse or survive. Meanwhile, other people wait and watch to see if I'll make it. Clients wait for their work product. Kids wait for me (to be their Mommy). J waits for me (to calm down mostly). All the while, I am hoping not to "drop a ball" because I don't have the patience, time, or stamina to fix the mess. Half the time I am surrounded by post it notes covered in lists so that the balls remain carefully balanced on the cones until I have time to grab them.

But today, #5 resonates with me the most. Oh, my eldest darling baby boy, Lulo, starts preschool next week. This week we have made "visits" to the classroom together. The first visit I was with him the whole time. He enjoyed himself thoroughly but skeptically. At today's visit, the teacher suggested that I let him go with her and see how he does. He shrieked, wailed, gasped, and sobbed - no matter what the distraction. I watched, sadly, painfully, from inside as he was on the playground with his teacher. I could hear him. I can still hear him. There I was trying to go one direction and my heart was being tugged so vigorously in the other. I get that this isn't Sophie's Choice. I get that parent's do this all the time. I get that this isn't a "big deal". But, Oh My Goodness, this is a killer.

How do people do this? Let go. Trust others. Believe friends when they say, "this is normal", "they all cry and then they get used to it". Oh sigh. I survived 15 minutes of his wails and rescued him. Yet, it is an obstacle I must survive so that we can all grow, learn, and become strong. I sort of prefer obstacle #6 to obstacle #5- in moderate pain but "resting" so I can just watch him a little longer, sit with him a little longer, play with him a little longer, rest with him a little longer - all the while, in moderate pain, because one day he'll have to go (home schoolin' ain't gonna happen ;)). Why do I have to run in the opposite direction if he is pulling me to him? Why oh why.